Saturday, July 2, 2011

Because I Need to Look Stupid Once a Day

Because I need to look stupid at least once a day I decided it would be a GREAT idea to take my dog and my son to get donuts and make a stop at the bank this morning. It was just me and the little guy so a sprinkle donut sounded like a good "sorry your sister is loved by all and is never home" breakfast. But when I put on capris and flip flops and then grabbed my keys my dog went crazy. Her head and her butt were both wagging and she was so excited she jumped over the couch to get to the door....of course I felt guilty! And because I'm an idiot I thought, "hey, it would be great to just take her with us - she's fine in the car."

And she was fine IN the car. We got to the donut shop and picked out the most sprinkly ones, got back into the car no prob. She was just sitting in the front drooling on the window. The bank is literally 3 blocks away so we meandered over there. It wasn't open yet but apparently 3 day weekends mean you need to carry cash because the walk up had a line of 4 people. So I went through the drive through - only one car! While waiting I stupidly remembered that my driver window is broken. Idiot. And at that moment two cars pulled in behind me. Of course. So I man up and jump out of the car with my ATM card and deposit. I stick my card in the ATM and I hear my six year old yell, "no Veruca!" luckily for me I turned my head just in time to witness my sleek black lab/mastiff mix leap elegantly out the window of the car and gallop toward me at the ATM. I figured, do the deposit and then put the black beast back in the car and hope no one makes eye contact with me. Veruca had other plans.

Oh, she sat sweetly next to me while I make my quick deposit and she followed me back to the driver side to get in.....but when I said, "V get in the car" she ran around to the passenger side, so I gritted my teeth, walked around to open that side, but by that time she had gone to the drivers side and now there are four cars in the drive through and my stupid dog is trying to play chase in the parking lot of the bank. Just because it's Chase bank doesn't me you need to lead me on one! Darn dog, get in the freakin car! Fine! So I got in without her and drove out of the drive through, parked and gave her my mom look. She immediately stopped galavanting around and calmly walked over to get in the car. I swear I almost heard her think, "well why didn't you just say so!" #*@&!!!

I'm telling you that mothers have the most self control in the world - we don't shake our babies when we want to or ship them to forgein countries and I controlled myself NOT to give that four-legged third child of mine a sweeping kick to the hiney as she leapt gracefully into the car. We have to have tons of self control because, in hindsight, sometimes, we make the stupidest decisions that make us look like complete blundering idiots. For me....it's at least once a day.

No comments:

Post a Comment